Entry 21 : My Cokoloto

Hello~

     Cokoloto turned one last week. She is such a big girl now! Who the hell is Cokoloto? My cute, playful big cat. Actually, she doesn't have brown fur even, it's just me who want to call her like that. I only realized it awhile after I thought about her. I really want to hug her right now. It just, I feel bad to the fact that I can't see her in her birthday(pfft). Unfortunately, I didn't have her photos before I got here. She must be missing me too, as I am the one that always play with her. IMaybe my father will take care of her but not my mom. My mom absolutely not one of the list that willingly take care of her, she even didn't want to touch her. Even so, she still okay if the cat play around her. Haha. My mom still have humanity, okay.

     Oh man, speaking test is on 29 July. That means this Monday! For God sake, I'm still not ready yet for this. I feel so much butterflies in my stomach. I got nervous easily, up to level I might cry for no reason. When I get nervous, I really speaks way too fast, and it resulting my tongue got twisted. I still can recalled when I do the oral in front of my class, in secondary school. My tongue twisted numerous time. Haha. It can be a good memory for me, though. Still, my English isn't bad at all....maybe? What do you think? Okay enough? Although my English is good, but I lack of confidence if I have to give a talk in front of people. Scary. Ah, how am I going to do with myself? Going to figure it out later.

So now, let me go to bed first. Adios!

Entry 20 : I have a dream~

* This post is for myself. I'm finding myself a strength when everything are messed up. I have a dream. If you know your dream is become nearer and nearer, you will never stop to pursue it. Aiseyman Atikah. Well said! Haha. Chaiyok! Chaiyok!

 I have a dream, a song to sing  

To help me cope with anything 

If you see the wonder of a fairy tale 

You can take the future even if you fail 

I believe in Allah 

Something good in everything I see  

I believe in Allah

When I know the time is right for me 

I'll cross the stream ------I have a dream  

I have a dream, a fantasy  

To help me through reality  

And my destination makes it worth the while 

Pushing through the darkness still another mile 

I believe in Allah  

Something good in everything I see 

I believe in Allah 

When I know the time is right for me 

I'll cross the stream -------I have a dream 

I'll cross the stream -------I have a dream  

I have a dream, a song to sing 

To help me cope with anything 

If you see the wonder of a fairy tale 

You can take the future even if you fail 

I believe in Allah 

Something good in everything I see 

I believe in Allah 

When I know the time is right for me 

I'll cross the stream -------I have a dream  

I'll cross the stream ------- I have a dream

Entry 19 : The last 10 of Ramadhan ;))

Bismillah.

Finally, Ramadhan is in the last 10. Must be the Muslims right now so buzy to grab the rewards that our God give to His servants in this last ten of Ramadhan, right? O Allah, please give me the strength to be apart of the group that very eager and excited want to pursue your rewards. Amin!

Let me ask you a thing. What is different between tahajjud and Qiamulail?

Tahajjud simply means we do a prayer after we wake up from sleep for awhile after the Isya'.

Qiamulail means that we liven up the night by doing something good such as read the Al-Quran, study, I don't know, maybe help your mom make the 'kuih raya' and continue sewing your clothes. Haha. Okay, no offence. 

Even so, both of it really have its own rewards for those who works on it and put Allah first in everything. Well, I also noted this as for myself too. So, I hope that all of us will make a time for it.

At home, I noticed that my father always wake up in the night and then he perform the tahajjud. I really want to be like that but the fact that I can't get up easily after I fell asleep troubled me sometimes. So, there will be times when I perform the tahajjud and sometimes I don't. Hehe ;))

Okay, that's all. I hope we will meet again next time! 

Entry 18 : The test

Tok! Tok! Assalamualaikum!

     Oh wow! Hi! I just finish studying the Biology and Mathematics as the test is on Monday and Tuesday respectively. I don't how the question is, but I just hope that it is not so hard. Our teacher, Madam Ku Suyati said that the questions about chapter 1 and 2 only. I don't know if I can perform it well. I might let my teacher down, if I get low marks than I should be. As for the Mathematics subject, the teacher said that from chapter 1 until chapter 4, will be confirm in the test. The matrices is the one that troubled me so much right now. I still don't understand about this topic. I just found it a little bit confusing for me. There's a lot of queries that I want to ask to the teachers but I can't find the right time to see them in cubicle. When I have the time, the teachers aren't in their places. So frustrating, sometimes 

     Even so, if I manage to study with my roommates, maybe, in shaa allah, I will get some of the knowledge. Better half than nothing, right? Who knows, maybe if I study well for this night, I may answer well in the test. I just say maybe, I didn't say it's confirm, okay? So, I better make my leave then. Pray for me tomorrow!

Entry 17 : Ohh, bazaar?

Assalamualaikum ;)

     Here I am sitting in the room, with my roommates, waiting for the azan to break the fast. A lot of foods that we brought from the bazaar. I went to buy a nasi kerabu with fried chicken. We share the foods together, all of us can have some of the tastes of the food. Is my sentences are correct? Oh, you know what, everyday I use up to RM6 to buy foods. I should be more careful in handling my financial. If I didn't manage it properly, I might risk my life here then. So, start from tomorrow, I will buy food below than RM4, if I can. I will try, though. In addition, I had made a rough calculation. If I buy foods at the Cafe A, I got to save some of my money. Usually, I spent RM3.90 per food that I buy there. So, maybe after this, I buy more at Cafe A. That is also depends if I lazy to go to cafe, I just straight to the bazaar, I guess.

     Oh, around 11:20 pm, just now, my childhood friend suddenly call me. Actually, he also got enrolled here too. What a coincidence! But we never get chances to see each other. Maybe he got so buzy handling his stuffs here. What all I know that he got Module 2 because he didn't took the Biology subject. We went chatting until the clock ticking to the midnight.So many things that we talk about. Doesn't he has anything to do? I want to do my blogging here. So at the end we ended up our talk and I also want to finish up this entry too because I totally feel sleepy right now.

     So then, let's make a stop here. Goodbye! See you later!

Entry 16 : IT"S BIOLOGY TIME!

Hi!

     Okay, when in the Biology lab practical, we had been asked to do an experiment about transport across membrane. We divided into two experiments; in plant cell and animal cell. Get ready for the explanation. 

     Let's move to plant cell first. In this experiment, we must carry out the osmotic pressure of potato cells. So, of course we need a fresh potato. We prepared 15 potato strips and ready for to be weight. The result of the mass, Alin is the one who recorded in her book. Then, we prepared five boiling tubes containing different sucrose concentrations. Next, each of them, we put 3 potato strips to be equal and waited for 30 minutes. 

     In the meantime waited for the potato strips to react, we pursue to the second experiment. In the next experiment, we needed to carry out the haemolysis and crenation of erythrocytes. Sounds professional, right? To accomplish this experiment, we need a donor of the blood. Sabariah, or Sue, generously giving us her blood, despite being afraid of the needle sterilized lancet to prickle her finger later. Before we started prickled her finger that had been wiped with alcohol, she looks a bit scared. She even not dared to look up her finger. The one who carried the job to prickle her finger is me. After she recited some du'a, the process of it went smoothly. Her blood also came out pretty good, even though her face looks really pale. She almost fainted. The blood then dropped into each of the prepared test tube and left for a few minutes. After that, we observed the blood. The teacher complaint that the blood looks pretty. She proudly said that it's hers. Yeah, she deserves that praises. 

      Remember our first experiment? After the 30 minutes are over, we weighted it back for recorded. So that's how our experiments today are ended. Thanks for reading allthough it's boring to the maxi. Hehe ;))

Entry 15 : It's so heart-throbbing to see them...

Assalamualaikum...

     Everyone seems busy packing their stuffs, ready to get home, while I just silently watching them from afar. How nice it would be if my family suddenly come out from nowhere to surprise me, but I know it's impossible. I don't want to selfishly trouble them by coming here. How bad something is happening, I'll never tell them,. Whatever it may costs me, I'll take the responsible. Still, I also want to celebrate the Al-Mubarak with them. Ah, I miss to go to the bazaar nearby my house. The aunt that sells nasi lemak surely be there. Every years I never fail to not to visit her stall. It looks like I break my promise to her this year. Hmm...

     After I made a call to home, I figured out that all my siblings are all at home right now. That means only me left that doesn't present in that house. How sad can I be? When I went to the bazaar here, suddenly a vision of my father come through my mind. I used to go to bazaar with him and my younger brother. Oh man, I super-duper miss them. At this rate, even when I'm eating, I'll break down hard. Haha, what an exaggerating person am I.

     Even so, there's a few benefits if you stay here. I focus more onto study. I accomplished some of my works too. I keep repeating to myself that this lasts only for a year. Although they said a year but it is not exactly it is, we have 10 months left here. After you subtract the time for holiday, time to seep and eat, all left for us almost 8 months, in my rough calculation. So, I will make a promise for myself that I will try harder in order to get a good results. Especially in Science computer and Chemistry. In shaa allah. 

Entry 14 : 'Secret'...

Assalamualaikum and hi!

     I want to tell you guys about a good movie I recently watch. Actually, I had watched this movie when I was in my Form 1, around in 2008, but I still want to re-watch it. Have you ever heard of 'Secret'? This awesome film directed by Jay Chou, a creative Taiwanese director in creating his masterpiece. I'm so dumbfounded throughout the movie. The plot had been arranged nicely and its visual effects also the best. This film tells a 'simple yet beautiful' love story. The main actor, which is actually Jay Chou himself and the actress, Gwei Lun-Mei, really play well in emotions. Jay Chou, beforehand, also good in piano and Chopin is his favorite. The end of this film is unexpected and I enjoy it so much. So, I already listed it as my one of the best movie I'd ever seen and I won't lying, seriously. It was also nominated as the Best Asian Film but didn't won, but it's okay. I really recommend this movie to you.

The poster of 'Secret'

Jay Chou and Gwei Lun-Mei

    As for this week, I'm having two tests; Biology and Mathematics. Despite both I think are simply hard, but for me, the most toughest is the Chemistry subject. I really not interested in Chemistry, even when I am in secondary school. Although I tried hard on it, my result always ended up at grade C+. I didn't have a good chemistry with Chemistry, though. Haha. Even so, I just hope that I didn't messed up in my UPS. I'll be a dead meat if I didn't perform well. 

    Before we end this here, I would like to say something to you. 'Dream high, beyond expectation, be extraordinary and make sure that all of these effort are being made because of Allah s.w.t.'. If we have the passion to success, our actions also are going through it too, in shaa allah.

Entry 13 : My Chinese-looking friend

Hello, we meet again!

     I just having a chit-chat with my best friend, which I met her in PLKN. She is now study in the business field in MMU. She do looks like a Chinese when I first met her. Her actual name is Fatin bte Ahmad Chang. Actually her mother married to a Chinese man, which was already married before, and she end up has step siblings. Maybe she is a half-Chinese and half-Malay, I guess. When she was kid, she got enrolled into a Chinese primary school. So that's why her Mandarin are so good, and she also one of my friends that taught me that language. When we in the dorm, we will never expect that she actually a Malay because she blend in with the Chinese people so well. She really looks like a truly Chinese.

     I admit that I love to be her friend because of her characters. She is a happy-go-lucky person. A far as I know her, during the 3 months there, I never seen her get angry. Even though that she is a bit clumsy but, I think that is suits her well. Haha. She isn't the type of person who love to do sports. Whenever I ask her to play volleyball or netball, she will keep running from me. If you request her to play a game, I mean a sport, she definitely says NO. I know she will, but it's okay because she is my friend. She also not a person who likes to judge a book by it's cover, just like me. Whatever it is, I like to befriend with her forever.

     How I wish there is somebody that I can make a best friend here, like her. Ahh...but it seems impossible right now. I need to stop first because after this I'm going to do my works and go to sleep. So, I will see you next. BYE!!

Entry 12 : Fasting months now!!

Assalamualaikum everyone! How are you guys going?

     I am here, wanting to tell you some menu that our Prophet s.a.w. that he always eat during fasting month. Actually, I overheard this over the radio; IKIM.fm to be exact. So, I thought it's going to be useful to all of us, moreover, we can practice for it too.What I write is only 35% of what that narrator said because she spoke way too fast and I barely could catch up with her.

     You know what? Our Prophet s.a.w. never complaint what he really want to eat. He only eat what he had. Not only that, the foods also are easy to make and find. What are the menus? Here are some of it, hope we can practice this together :

• Dates and a glass of plain water.
• Tharid which is a bread that mixed with meats and some gravy
• Breads with vinegar.
• Breads with olive oil.
• Breads with cheese
• A porridge that made up from milk and wheat 
• Breads with dates.
• Dates with butter.
• Dates and cucumber
• Dates and a slice of watermelon.

     See how simple and healthy the foods are. Even though the quantities that we assume are so little but he made his day through the Ramadhan month only consume that foods. So, how about us?

Entry 11 : I'm dying for sweets!!

HI!

    Well, hello there. Haha. For some reasons, I really want to eat some slices of cakes, or should I say, the whole cake by myself? I never get the chances to eat cakes here. Can you hear my stomach starts to growl here? Okay, I already set it up, when I go home for this Raya Puasa, I'll make my sister bake a cake for me. Sounds cruel, huh? Even she furious at me first, she will do it lastly. Why? A simple answer; because she loves me! Furthermore, in that house, only me who she can make an 'experiments' with. I will do the testing the tastes of the cakes that she made. Among of the cakes that she made, I really love the blueberry cheese cake one. Totally superb. How nice it can be if I can eat those cakes at these times? Uh-oh. I also talked to my 'sis' that I want to make the honey cornflakes when I go home. Somehow, I just felt it is more like a tradition, because we always make that during the previous Raya Puasa. I enjoy making and eating it so much. Ah, my mouth started to watery right now. 

     All right, I need to stop here. I will come back after I had finished dream about my sweet and tasty cakes. Good night, buddy!

  

Delicioso!

What a beautiful~

P/S : Hmm...I don't want pictures. I want the real one!

Entry 10 : My PLKN memories~

Assalamualaikum,

         Here I just want to share something about my PLKN stuffs.  Yes, I know, it was over for almost 5 months already, but still, the memories that we cherish together will not easily forgotten by me. From there, I learnt how to be more brave to come upfront. Of course I am nervous, but you can't have something if you don't try for it, right? Yeah, I got a lot of friends there. Chinese, Indian and Malay, of course. Oh, did I mention about the Sarawak and Sabah people also came to that PLKN. Various of friends really make me exciting! They are all the best, because they share the same thought as mine. 

This is my Sarawak' friends

My close friends in PLKN

         Well, I also practicing  my Mandarin language there too. My Mandarin is still not strong enough, but they willingly helped me learnt it. They are so kind, I mean, those Chinese. Sometimes, after they taught me Mandarin, in exchange, I taught them Jawi. They said that they love how it looks. Although their writing is completely a bit untidy, but still okay. Still can be read by us. I got my name written in Jawi by them, and yes, I treasure it a lot.

          Various of competition are held among the companies; Alpha, Bravo, Charlie and Delta. I am the Bravo one. To be proud to say this, my Bravo company got No.1 for overall of those. One of the competition is decorating our dorms and its got judged once a week. Well...in this case, my company got No.2 after had been added up with the boys points. It was not bad, though. We cleaned up the dorms every weekends. Not only the dorms, but also included the toilets and the drains. If we had a little bit extra time, we do the decorating stuffs, etc.

           Back then, was a heaven, I told you. The food had been served at the precise time. All the things you got to do is, grab the plate, queued up, take the food and swallowed it all. Not so hard, right? It was free, and of course I didn't want it to be a waste. I enjoyed it to the fullest, man! Please, I am not the type of person who worried about their weight. Even I eat a lot, my weight still going to be constant. The average that I can assume is about 59 kg < x < 65 kg. During my time there, I gain only 1 kg, despite, I don't know, a drastically increase about my weight? Whatever it is, I enjoyed my meal there. Besides, it is free and I didn't have to use my money to buy something to eat. Unless if I want to eat ice-cream. Haha.

            Okay, maybe I'll just stop here. Actually, there's more that I want to show you guys, but maybe next time. So then, adios! 

      

Entry 9 : Oh my weekends!!

     I simply love weekends. Why do I say so? Let's say that , only at those leisure time, I get to do my things done. Maybe I should 'qadaq' my sleep then? Haha. Nah. Being here, for crying out loud, could make me insane! For my matters, which I mean, a pile of works needed to finish instantly. Oh yeah, have you ever heard a quote 'Time waits for no man'? It means that the time is not going to wait for you; you are the one that need to catch it up. If you are late, you are at loss. Well, I guess its true, though. So, even my mind and body desperately wants to enjoy the pleasure of weekends, I, somehow, have to consider about that. Some works must be submitted on this Monday, such as Biology lab report, Science Computer tutorial and Chemistry lab report as well. 24 hours per day isn't enough, really.

     Okay, back to our original topic, as I mention earlier, I love weekends. Oh, as I have much time left around the midnight, I spend it through watching a movie. It's has been awhile since I have not open my laptop. Even though I am blogging right now, I took a minute to watch Running Man; my favorite show ever. I don't want to explain it further because my entry is going to be full of it, where I'm sure enough about it. I watch it almost 2 episodes all together, and when I realize then, the time shown by my watch is about 2 am! So I hurried finish up my blogging for today and went to sleep. So, farewell then!

Entry 8 : Problems, why u no gone?

Hallo~~

Ahh, need some more time. Living here making me suffocate, really. Having a lot of problem in my mind right now, unsolved problems, until up to a level I cried. Sounds silly, right? Hmm...I don't know what else can I do. Argh, why I keep telling my problems here? One of the critical problems that I must faced is my financial problem, of course. I want to tell you more but let me keep this simple. I assumed that I'll use money to buy food just RM4 per day, I already fixed about it. Of course it is not enough for the big-eater like me. But I already exceed my money on food for today and yesterday also. Pergh!!! I cannot imagine how I gonna live for the next day. Must be a lot of money I use for useless thing. (Hmm? Really? Is buying food really is a useless things?) Ahh...I don't know yet. If I know the answer, I'll let you know. But for now, let me do something is more important right now, which is, study the science computer. See? This is one of the problems and not to mention about the chemistry subject also. I cannot understand some of the notes. But I'll find a way to overcome it. Somehow, I just feel that I am not serious about my study. I lack of confidence in myself. How I am suppose to do? If I getting myself way like this, seriously, my future is going to doom, man! So, in shaa allah, I'll gather my will to change it. Oh, God, please don't torture me anymore.... 

Okay. Chiao!!

Entry 7 : Tired but...

     Last night, I slept at the time near 11 pm. Oh? Peculiar, right? But that's what happened! Usually I made my move to bed at least the clock ticking near 1 am. Maybe I used up all my energy during the daytime. I'm not sure what that I've done...but certainly tiring. Maybe the aerobic cause it. Or more to my brain who is tired actually? Hmm....okay. Leave aside those question.

     What I really want to say that, because I went to bed early than I expected, that's, you know, today I accidentally woke up earlier, about 4.30 am. I remembered that today I am going to sit for a test. A computer science one. I think it's scheduled exactly at 5.15 pm. You know I'm not well-prepared for this. Hoping a miracle come to me is completely absurd, so of course I need to be more, more work hard than anybody else, otherwise, I will get a shameful results, don't you think? So because of that, I need to study! So then, goodbye. Wish me luck to get a good outcome from it.

Entry 6 : The allowances already in~

Olla~~

I heard that the allowance for this month are already in. But some of us only. Not ALL OF US are getting it yet. Well, surely heaven is coming. Hahaha, brows lifted! Okay. I mustn't be a spendthrift. Control yourself. This money isn't for to fulfil your fun or what. This money only for your study, okay? Say it hundred times, but when you see a thing that attracted, you must be considered to buy it, isn't? We are just human. Even we do not want to do something, sometimes we can't resist it. Yeah right. Well said, Atikah! Clap your hands. Actually, there are many things that I want to buy when I went to outing. We'll see how I manage to buy the cheapest and the qualities is the greatest of all it. Hahah...what am I nagging about? Whatever the commotion is about, my first priority is FOOD! I must buy the food otherwise I'll be the dead meat. Hyperbola. This time I want to buy. Let's make a list ;)

1. A packet of pears
2. Biscuits
3. Testpad
4. Sweets
5. Chocolates
6. Breads
7. And many more....heheh

 Okay. Let's stop here. I will add the list next time. Heheh ;)

Entry 5 : "Aerobic Style"

Hello~

We meet again. Miss me? Haha! Yeah right. Ah, I want to share something to you all. Today, when the co-curiculum period, we did the aerobic. Seriously, I don't like to do aerobic. No style. Haha, silly excuses. Okay, here comes the best part. When I do the aerobic, the Wonder Girl song come out! The title of the song is Nobody. Wow, the cat really catch my tongue there.  This is the exact song where my old friends and I did the aerobic too during the Pendidikan Jasmani period back then. We are asked to create an aerobic which is rely on our creativity. We must finish it between 5-10 minutes. Of course we made the simplest one. Amateur. There are 18 girls in my class which will combine with the girls from another class. Then we compete with them. It's weird how that stage able to accommodate us. I thought that the stage going to collapse if we are jumping instead of just doing the poco-poco one. Man, I still can recall it like yesterday...how I miss them so much right now. Ah, I really want to show it to you guys but the video is not here. Whatever it is, I just enjoy for today. I just hope that I WILL enjoy for tomorrow to. Without worries, of course. So then, have a nice day!!

P/S : Why the teachers are not include the Gangnam Style song? Weird.

Entry 4 : My little chaotic sister ;))

Assalamualaikum and hi~

Well, I had talk over phone with my younger sister who are sitting for her PMR exam this year. She tells me that she so stressed up with her friends. She told me that her friends no longer want to befriends with her. She tried to consult why with them but they kept running away from her. In the end, she seek my help, while crying out loud on the phone. I just cannot do anything. All I can do just giving her my advice. Mostly I heard sobs over there. I told her that maybe she made something that they are not comfortable with. She said that of course she did something wrong towards them but she just couldn't figure it out. But when she tried to find out with asking them, they will running away. She couldn't stand anymore and had enough with it and that's why she finds me. At last, I just say that she should just concentrate on her trial exam which is coming soon on this June and put this problem aside first. And we talked endlessly. After a half and hour, our conversation ended. When I checked the balance of my topup, only RM0.40 left from RM1.54. It's okay as long as she felt relieved a bit, right? So then, that's all for this entry. Actually, I musn't tell someone else's problems here, right? Because this is my blog and I suppose to talk about my problems or myself,isn't? Ah, nevermind. Okay, goodbye~

P/S: Oh my credits!! I need to topup quickly!

Entry 3 : Hmm??

In the meantime listening to the radio, a bollywood song popped out! The OST of the 'Kabhi Kushi Kabhi Gham'. It's really have been a long time since I heard a bollywood song like this. This make me remind back to the old school times, when my friend and I watched the TV during the holidays together. Every Saturday. Despite having a class that day, we surely able to make it there. How I missed them very much. I really have a good times with them. Haha...at this rate, surely I going to talk over my flashback memories. Nah, let's put them aside.

Now, I'm listening my father's song. 'Perpisahan yang kau minta'. I really missed to hear him singing at the veranda while doing his work. Even knowing his voice isn't come out beautifully but he'll continue it. He just do what he wants to do. Sometimes, I also joined him. But mine is better. Haha...what the? Complaining the others and praising yourself.  Heh.

Entry 2 : Life isn't simple, right?

     Ahh...so tired today. I miss my mum. Oh, okay. Mentioning my family going to make my eyes watery. I lost my purse which means I lost my money. The baddest of all, I did't realize at all until I got into Cafe A. Seriously, I don't know where it goes to. But for God's sake, I rather not eating a lunch in a week in order to save money here. I save it on the things that I need to buy especially books or notes. I only get to eat if I really desperate for it. But now? How I'm gonna survive myself? I don't want to make my parents agitated about unrelevant things like this. How come I let them come here, which is far kilometers from home, just because of me? UNREASONABLE. They also tired from working too. Okay. Now the tears are flowing down fluently on my cheeks. Ahh...why it didn't want to stop? I know, it's just a small matter but it can be this big for me when you think about your parents. Oh God. I'm speechless. Really, really speechless.  I already looked to where I walked before this. I walked the same paths before I came to the cafe. But it's not there....sigh. What more I can do? It lost anyway. Even if I manage to find it, the money inside already gone, isn't? Haih...luck really is not mine here. Ahhh...tension. So,I want to take a nap, hoping this miserable thing didn't torture me anymore after I get up. Life must go on, right? But, still, it hurts me inside.

     From my point of view, I think that there's something behind this occurrence, it must be. I don't know what my God had set me something behind this. I just hope that tomorrow will be better and greater than today. Okay, wipe your tears and sleep. Thanks for reading. Bye.